Roohi

  Sep 26 2007  | Views 865 |  Comments  (8)
About a girl who was extremely beautiful... Expand

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  supriyad posted 10 mnths ago

Zero mysticism of love. This was purely physical you know!!

 

Dont make much sense to me. At all.



  Kapil Kansal posted 11 mnths ago

nice one



  karubaki posted 11 mnths ago

i went through ur blog.. a good efforst to made words into images.... BUT!!!! it is a vulgar one... too fleshy and canral in aa way... i cud almost smell the fleh in a dirty way... sorry for being rude!!! but it was more like a porn c grade literature... or b+ i would say... lively though... u said u trade path which not many do... but i did not see it anywhere in ur blog...



  Sushanta Sahu posted 11 mnths ago
  dee_maini posted 11 mnths ago

"She is a very slim girl of twenty four years old."
 
   I   couldn't move forward after the first line. It's glaringly wrong. The first line, or the first paragraph, decides the life of a story.
 
You might re-write it as : She's a twenty-four-year old, slim girl.
 
Deepak Maini



  swarajya posted 11 mnths ago

One must be lucky to win the heart of a beautiful girl.I enjoyed the story.



  smilejoye posted 11 mnths ago

it is a wonderful piece to read......while reading ....i felt why it finished... very good presentation.



  reflector posted 11 mnths ago

felt it ended too soon....well penned
 
reflector





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